Maybe you don't deserve it!

I mean, truthfully… do you deserve what you want? Do you really deserve the dreams and goals that you've set your sights on?  

Before you return with a scathing answer and get annoyed at my absurd presumptuous question, let me ask you another one.   Did it annoy you at all to be asked, "Do you deserve… happiness?"   If it did, then I am sad to inform you that you have the non-deserving disease.  

The non-deserving disease will slowly erode your belief in your ability to manifest.   It will perpetuate the idea that you are the only one in the universe that can't manifest what you want.   It will poison your mind against your own unlimited potential.   It will cause you to run in circles looking for the next latest and greatest self-growth technique, keep your therapist's pockets nicely lined, cause you to ignore your own successes.

Proper diagnosis of this disease is tricky because most of the time, although it may be quite obvious to others, we can't see the symptoms.   Or, more accurately, we CHOOSE not to see the symptoms.

For example, if I said to you, "You have the ugliest curly hair I've ever seen!"   If you have curly hair - this might offend you.   If however, you don't have curly hair then you'd dismiss my words as non-sense.  

For curly hair owners, this may have triggered the thoughts you had as a child about NOT wanting curly hair, or reminded you of the embarrassment you felt when you were teased about your curls.   Maybe you still have insecure thoughts as you wake up in the morning and look like my daughter, Ashlyn - who arises as the "wild-bed-head-girl" until we saturate her curls with the detangle spray!   (I tell her she's beautiful, by the way, and I love her wild-bed-head look!)

If you love your curls, you've never, ever wished for something different, or you have straight hair then my words do not trigger the non-deserving disease.   However, if you find yourself reacting defensively to my words then somewhere in the subconscious folds of your being, you have the non-deserving disease.  

Now, for those of you who feel left out, "You have the ugliest straight hair, I've ever seen!"   Did I miss anyone…?? Oh, how about…   "You have the ugliest bald head I've ever laid eyes on!"

We all have the disease on some level, don't we?!    The issue becomes what we do with it that matters now.   If you aren't getting what you want in life, and you've been trying to manifest it then more than likely your self-esteem needs a boost in order to cure yourself of the non-deserving disease.

I met Jack Canfield, self-esteem expert and famed author of the Chicken Soup for the Soul Series, during the time when his first soup book was hitting the best sellers list.   He inspired me to understand my feelings of deservingness as a self-esteem issue, and taught me a tool that I still use today.    

He teaches the formula, "E+R=O (Event + Response = Outcome):   It is not external events, but one's responses (the R - which are changeable) that determine one's level of success or failure, health or illness, fulfillment or frustration."

For example, if you have wanted to attract a mate, and have used my 21-day program, or have been visualizing for months and months and haven't attracted your partner yet… then ask yourself, "do I deserve a mate?   Do I deserve to be in a loving relationship with my Divine Life Partner?"  

If you feel defensive about this question, then you know you need to dig deeper, and the more defensive you feel, the bigger the issue.

What judgments do you make about yourself that suggest you don't deserve?   Have you ever said, "Maybe, I'm not thin enough; maybe, I'm not fat enough; maybe, I'm not rich enough; maybe, I'm too picky; maybe, I'm not stable enough"?  

What judgments do I make about myself that might be leading my sub-conscious mind to believe that I'm not worthy of what I want, or I do not deserve.  

It's not enough to just ignore the feelings of unworthiness. You must counter these beliefs with genuine high self-esteem and confidence.   The more you believe in your own worth and that you truly deserve to have all that you desire, the easier it will be to intentionally manifest what you want in life.  

Try these five steps to increase your self-esteem and treat the non-deserving disease.

•  Monitor your defensiveness.

If you feel defensive (about anything), then you are in that moment taking something personal.   Taking something personal is a symptom of the non-deserving disease.

•  Make a decision to NOT take it personal.  

The fourth agreement in Don Miguel Ruiz's The Four Agreements is "Don't Take Anything Personally."   This is a choice.   Remember, it's not the event that creates the outcome, but your response to that event.   If you don't take it personally, you are free to feel good about yourself as the fabulous human being that you really are.

•  Accept Your Humanness.

When you do take it personal, acknowledge the feelings of non-deservingness, the core limiting beliefs that you resist that continue to say, "I'm not worthy!"   Then, let them be there.   Acknowledge the fact that you are human and therefore, you will always be both worthy and unworthy and there's nothing you can do about this.   Then, hand your humanness over to Spirit.   "God, you handle this issue!"  

•  Increase Your Emotional Bank Account

Make deposits into your own emotional deservingness account.   Tell yourself you are worthwhile, lovable, and beautiful and accept yourself exactly as you are.   Do not wait for outside circumstances, or people to validate your worthiness.   Make your own deposits and love yourself.

•  Meditate on the Divine Perfection of Life

One of the greatest symptoms of non-deservingness is making assumptions that what you've just received is NOT right.   For example, if you want to attract a mate, and you meet someone who on the surface looks great but then turns out to be a dud.   When you suffer from the non-deserving disease, you judge this event as wrong, out of order, not what you were wanting.   This only perpetuates and continues to attract the opposite of what you want.   However, if you continue to remember that you are always attracting what you want, and somehow this was perfect for your path, and now you are free to attract the next experience that is even more in alignment with your identified desires - then you eradicate the disease and proceed with the knowingness that all is well!

Increasing your self-esteem and ridding your life of the non-deserving disease is an inside job.   It's worth the effort because, in the end, what you will receive is the happiness that you truly desire and naturally deserve!