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Manifesting Your Heart's Desires Requires you to Stop Wanting them

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I have been using the law of attraction for a while now and have had various things manifest. What I would like is to meet my ideal partner and to live in a beautiful house with a lot of land. While I have had some success with manifesting money, I would like more. Do you think it's because I doubt that I can get these things that is preventing them from coming to me?
- Tina from the UK

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Doubt, fear, and (oddly enough) desire can prevent us from manifesting the things we want to manifest.

It's my belief that the Universe responds to the most dominant vibration at all times. The Universe is never inconsistent with this rule - there are no exceptions.

A very wise teacher once said to me, "If you want to know what you want, look at what you've got."

I completely resisted this crazy idea for a very long time. I didn't understand why she would say to me that I 'wanted' what I had?!? How could she possibly believe that I WANTED to be broke (and I mean peanut butter and crackers for breakfast, lunch and dinner broke - broke)? And, if I'm to figure out what I want by looking at what I had, does that mean that I wanted bad relationships with philandering alcoholics?

That was just crazy! Why would I want these things? No one in their right mind would WANT these things?!

Desire - even your heart's desire can drive away your dreams.

There are two things that must be adjusted when we discover that we are not manifesting our heart's desires. The first is to move beyond wanting and into accepting and the second is to reverse the pay-off to not having what we say we want.

To address the first issue:

We cannot intentionally attract what we WANT but we can always attract what we ACCEPT.

For example, Imagine that you want a glass of water. Say, "I want a glass of water."

Now check in to your thoughts and emotions about getting a glass of water.

    • Do you feel doubt because you fear that you won't get your glass of water in a timely manner?
    • Do you feel envy about others having the water you want?
    • Do you feel disappointment ahead of time because your glass of water won't be as fulfilling as what you would like for it to be?

When we 'want a glass of water", most of us do not feel any fear about whether or not we can get up and quench our thirst right away. We simply want it and get up to get it!

However, if you were one of the tens of thousands of New Orleans' residents last year that had spent days on end without electricity and water, do you think that your emotions about "I want a glass of water" during that time might be different?

Now, imagine that you want a loving relationship.

Say, "I want a loving relationship."

(If you have a loving relationship, use this exercise to want something more out of your relationship; something that you don't have but want.)

  • Do you feel doubt because you haven't had a successful relationship in a while or ever?
  • Do you feel envious of others who've found their one and only true love?
  • Do you feel sad because you aren't pretty enough, young enough, successful enough or good enough to attract the quality of mate that you desire?
  • Do you feel disappointed at the end of every day because your mate didn't show up and fulfill your heart's desires today?
  • Do you feel disappointment ahead of time because your mate won't be as fulfilling as what you would like for him/her to be?

The key to getting what we WANT is to ACCEPT it. Acceptance is the positive vibration of fulfillment while Desire is the negative vibration of lack and craving.

If you want a glass of water, you simply want it, get up and get it because you accept the fact that your thirst will be handled quickly and easily.

If you want a relationship, you simply want it and get up and get it because you accept the fact that you were born to have love and be divinely fulfilled. You accept the fact that you were meant to be in a loving relationship quickly and easily.

Unless of course, you've been through a terrible draught (no love, bad love) and fear that you can't quench your thirst (can't get a man/woman) and then no matter how bad you want water (a relationship), you are too fearful and doubtful to attract it with any ease.

If you want to know what you want, look at what you have. Then, turn your vibration from a place of longing, craving desire to a place of grateful acceptance.

Your objective is to feel as confident about having a loving relationship as you are about having a drink of water.

To address the second issue: The Pay-Off.

Every time we do not attract the love, wealth, health, etc. that we say we want there will be some type of pay-off that is keeping us from fully accepting that dream into our life. There will be some type of 'emotional or physical profit' that in this moment is more important to us than the fulfillment of our dream.

For example, for many, having a successful relationship, even though that's what they say they want, means giving up their freedom, their flexible schedules, their alone time, their intimacy shield, etc.

Or, when it comes to wealth, the pay-off for 'not having wealth' is that they don't have to face others asking them for money, or face the responsibility that comes with wealth or deal with the possibility of failure to name just a few 'pay-offs'.

Or, when it comes to losing weight, one pay-off for 'not achieving ideal health' is that they don't have to be 'attractive to the opposite sex', for example.

If you look close enough, you will always find some kind of "pay-off' to not having what you say you want. Sometimes it's as simple as, "I get to be right" if I keep this negative thing or "I get to keep my 'oh-woe-is-me-story'" if I don't find my true love, or "this 'safe' place is more comfortable than the unknown" etc.

Once you've discovered the 'pay-off' find a way to discredit it. Demolish any idea that you can't have ALL that you desire:

- a healthy relationship AND your freedom
- wealth AND responsibility
- health AND safe attraction

If you want to know what you want, look at what you have. Then, turn your vibration from accepting/wanting the "pay-off" more than you want (accept) the dream fulfilled.

In summary, we manifest what the Universe receives as our dominant vibration. To change our point of attraction to be in harmony with our heart's desires we must ACCEPT (not just want) those 'heart desires' into our life and we must release the pay-off (the payment) for not having it.

Tip: You can remove the pay-offs with Emotional Freedom Technique and shift your vibration from Want to Acceptance by intentionally walking up the Map of Consciousness on a regular basis. (Join me at one of my free teleseminars to learn more about these techniques!)

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