Love versus Hormones in Vegas

First: Maintain the vision of you and children without attaching that vision to this man. If you desire children then you need not compromise on your desire, however, if you begin projecting your desire for children onto "this" relationship then you will surely become obsessed with changing his mind or angry at him for not being the one. Either way - you lose what is so wonderful in the moment and any possibility of recognizing the right relationship should it appear or unfold before you.

You are wise to contemplate the view from beneath the sheets - as hormones can camouflage it. For some, the moment great sex between complimentary partners has been achieved it's time for monogamy, mutual commitment, long-term planning and marriage. As ideal as this may be - it's irrational to base a marriage on compatible sex. It is possible that he is the one and it is also possible that he is merely a partial example of what's to come for you. What to do?

Simply choose courtship over sex until you KNOW by his words and actions alone. Let me clarify, I use the word courtship to imply old fashioned, get to know each other first - dating. I am suggesting you cultivate and nurture the relationship before acting on hormonal impulse. Your predicament is understandable. When we attempt to do something against the tide of our emotions, the habits of our past AND the predominant culture - frustration is only natural. The option of going with the flow of the moment, engaging in the passion of the hour and maintaining the "status quo" can be extremely tempting when coupled with the emerging emotions of love.

In the pursuit of one's dreams, specifically when we are learning the processes of deliberate, intentional manifesting, it's sometimes easy to fall into the fairy tale vision of our dreams. We tend to expect the Knight in Shining Armor to ride up on his White Stallion and the instant we lay eyes on each other - we will fall instantly, madly, wildly, passionately in love and it's all white picket fences from here. Okay, the Spiritual Truth is "anything is possible" however, I still have a sock on the ground and accept the reality of something more likely -- that a relationship has to be built, brick by brick, layer by layer, thought by thought.

Being a bit practical in my own evolution, I realize that today I still have to cultivate a relationship. I have to be willing to expose myself, be vulnerable, communicate my needs, probe completely into the needs of my mate, take risks, create a safe place for my mate to be themselves, express unconditional acceptance and commit to my highest intentions at all times.

As a rule, I reframe from "advice giving", as I sincerely believe all is well and whatever you choose will be the right option for you. And, this scenario is no different. You cannot get it wrong. However, you can create situations that cause you to resist your connection to Source and thereby cause you unnecessary pain. If you choose to be sexually intimate, do so in the full knowledge that you are choosing to make a conscious decision to be intimate with someone who does not want children -Period! Do not fool yourself into thinking that you can somehow create such a fabulous romance for him that he indeed will someday change his mind. You cannot create in someone else's world without their permission and the more you mentally project the thoughts "maybe he'll change his mind" the more resistance you can build in the relationship.

If you're thinking, "but, he already said he might change his mind," acknowledge that as a possibility but completely detach yourself from him changing his mind with you. Be completely grateful for what you've experienced thus far, ask for guidance as to how to continue, listen intently to your intuitive knowing and follow your heart. Navigate with your highest intentions and integrity as your compass and whatever you choose will be the perfect experience for you right now. This is a place of awareness and your eyes will be wide open no matter what you decide.