We were born with the unlimited potential to intentionally create (use the law of attraction) to manifest all of our heart's desires. Together, as Conscious Leaders guided by the Divine, we have the Mind Power necessary to co-create a sustainable, harmonious, peaceful, and prosperous world.  And, we can do this while also attracting and creating a passionate, loving, rich, healthy life with all of our personal dreams fulfilled.

August 26, 2010

Is a Linchpin Holding Your Limiting Beliefs in Place

Category: law of attraction — Anisa @ 12:08 pm

Erghhhh… and Hurumph… Do you ever feel like you’ll never
get through all your personal development work?  <Sigh>…
I understand.  I had more work to do this week as I fell
mindlessly into an old pattern.  I threw a temper tantrum
when I was mad at my honey.  I won’t go into all the
embarrassing details but I will say I threw his untouched
pizza in the sink and turned on the water.  All the while I
was saying to myself, “Don’t do it!  Don’t do it!”  I sat in
front of that sink speechless.  I was so ashamed that I
could be so childish and vindictive, in spite of my
awareness that “we catch more flies with honey than
vinegar”, I was unable to stop myself!

Q's upset - when I drown his pizza

Fortunately, he has forgiven me and I’ve vowed to never
touch his food again when I’m upset.

Now, for those who want to email and scold me (I know some will), go ahead…
I forgive you, even if you can’t forgive me for being a teacher that is imperfect but real.

The point I’d like to share is that we never stop growing
and we never get finished.  As Abraham, with Jerry and
Esther Hicks might say, “You can’t get it wrong and you’ll
never get it done!” That’s okay… we can laugh at our
progress as long as we are indeed progressing.

In today’s Quick Manifesting Morsel, I address this very
issue of “Never getting it done!” BUT how to get as much done as quick as possible, just the same…
Here’s the question -

“But… there’s so much history and so many negative events.
I can’t help thinking that there must be a way to release my
past and heal my limiting beliefs without having to go back
through every memory.  I know others that live successful
lives and I can’t believe they all had to regurgitate all
their wounds to move forward.  Is this really necessary?
And, if it is – I might as well give up before I begin
because there’s just too many.”

I hope you find your ‘core issues’ and create personal peace
too!

Love and light,

Anisa Aven

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Q: "But… there’s so much history and so many negative events.
I can’t help thinking that there must be a way to release my
past and heal my limiting beliefs without having to go back
through every memory. I know others that live successful
lives and I can’t believe they all had to regurgitate all
their wounds to move forward. Is this really necessary?
And, if it is – I might as well give up before I begin
because there’s just too many." - Marie, L.A.

A:

No, you do not have to dredge up every past negative or
traumatic event in order to heal. However, let’s not kid
ourselves – there are times when we know our history is
holding us hostage. We know that there is something inside
that is causing our limited fulfillment. And, when we are
mindful enough to pay attention we sense the cryptic
whispers of our past: "Who do you think you are?" Or
"What’s wrong with you?" Or "I told you you’d never amount
to anything."

There are many pathways to wholeness. Some people, my
mother for example, find their purpose early (being a loving
mother is my mom’s purpose). Some have a natural ability to
simply forgive and flow. While my mom has had many negative
experiences that have told her she’s not good enough or
smart enough, she lives by the code of "Forgive and Love
first" and somehow this has afforded her a great deal of
happiness. For her, it’s not necessary to re-live and
process all of her life traumas in order to be fulfilled -
she already is. I believe it’s a choice she made a long,
long time ago.

However, I was not built like my mother; nor was my father.
My siblings and I have many ‘issues’ to deal with as a
result of our life experiences with him. And, of course
we’ve all experienced our own set of additional traumas and
tragedies.

For me, I have long sensed an inner mission and insatiable
compulsion to make a profound impact on this planet. As a
child, I had this recurring nightmare. I’d awake drenched
in cold sweats, shaking as I’d recall being a little girl in
a soft-blue dress standing at the top of a garbage heap;
greasy filth inching up my legs, spoiling my beautiful shoes
and dress. My perspective would shift and I’d see that I
was standing on top of our planet crying, exhausted with
hopelessness and overwhelm as I realized I was too small to
clean it all up. I was alone, helpless, and hopeless.

I now understand that I chose to be born at this time
because I wanted to make a different kind of contribution.
I understand that if I allow my limiting beliefs to
interfere with my purpose, I will be right – I’ll be too
small to make a difference. And, this fear of not being
enough has halted me on many occasions. I’ve missed more
than one express train to fulfillment because I was playing
too small and I was too insecure about my worth and value to
get on board.

If I could have chosen to ‘be enough’ then I would have.
But, I didn’t find that choice within until after I began to
process my life story, paying particular attention to all of
the emotional abuse perpetrated by my father. I won’t lie -
it wasn’t fun. One time, while at a seminar, I beat a chair
with a towel as we ‘Gestalted’ our way through the emotional
scale. I thought I would never stop crying. Now, I feel
very fortunate because I didn’t wait for the ‘magic potion’
to lift me into wholeness. I sought it with every ounce of
my being.

While the Gestalt session was a pivotal experience, I
discovered later that it was not the easiest way to release
my past. Of all the therapeutic techniques I’ve experienced
there are 3 "deconstruction’ tools and 4 "construction"
tools that I use almost daily: EFT, Surrogate EFT, & NLP
are my tools of choice for getting rid of my baggage
(deconstruction); Quantum Jumping, living visions,
coaching and meditation are my tools of choice for
intentional creation (construction). These are tools I use
personally to release my limiting beliefs and manifest my
dreams.

Take EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), for example. There
are other healing modalities and similar tapping techniques
that I could explore. But, EFT works for me. Thus, I don’t
feel compelled to continue hunting for more techniques. If
I have an upset or notice that I am playing ‘too small’, I
record it in my "PG ToDo" notebook. (PG stands for Personal
Growth and it’s a spiral notepad the size of my palm that I
keep with me at all times.) Then during my PG time (I
reserve time on my calendar and then commit to tapping as if
it were as important as breathing or eating), I open my PG
notebook, glance through and choose the item(s) that are
causing the greatest negative upset currently and tap it
out.

Initially, before my current ‘maintenance program’, I
recorded an inventory of every negative experience of my
life in a much larger notebook. I spent a couple of hours a
week for nearly 6 months tapping my way through the list.
Gary Craig, retired EFT founder, called this the "Personal
Peace" process because at the end of this effort you will
indeed experience a personal peace like never before. My
list was so long and just kept getting longer by the minute.
It was truly overwhelming to think that I would have to tap
on every ‘upset’ in my life! I ended up having 3 full
yellow notepads – one was for "prosperity/lack" limiting
beliefs/experiences, one was titled "love/relationship
limiting beliefs" and the third was "other". I thought I
would never get through it all. However, I was at that
proverbial fork in the road spiritually. I was either going
to DO WHAT MUST BE DONE or accept that I would forever be an
underachiever.

I was determined to break through my self-imposed barriers.
And I was banking on a little known fact about EFT – that
once you begin tapping on a particular "woundedness", even
though you may have 1000 memories and life experiences to
warrant that woundedness, you will not have to tap on each
memory (or event/feeling) to release it.

You may have to tap on a bunch but at some point the
structure of the wound begins to collapse. It’s unclear
whether or not that weakness in the limiting belief system
happens at 1%, 10%, or 60% of the memories. In fact, while
it can be a percentage that shifts the scales, there’s
another way to neutralize the negative vibration even faster
– find the "keystone" event that is holding it all together.
A keystone event can be described as the "linchpin" of a
limiting belief. It is usually a very early memory, such as
the very first traumatic experience that caused the limiting
decision. This keystone event is the source moment of the
core issue. It’s the cohesive foundation supporting the
limiting belief in the first place and thereby bolsters the
subsequent limiting decisions in place.

When we pull the linchpin of that first limiting decision,
everything shifts. Similar to shifting your home’s
foundation, everything shakes loose and eventually settles
back into place but never in quite the same way. I always
imagine that my limiting beliefs are lined up like dominos
and when I find that keystone memory and knock it down, I
watch in awe as all the ensuing dominos fall down, click,
click, click, click, one by one they wind and fall! It’s a
beautiful experience.

Here’s a simple process for finding your keystone events:

- Label 3 yellow notepads/ or sections in a spiral notebook:

o Prosperity/Lack

o Relationship/Love

o Other

- Leaving one small column to the left and one small column
to the right for future use, in the middle of the page,
create a bullet point list:

o For prosperity/lack: "When in my life, did I first feel
there was never enough money?" & "What does this feeling of
‘lack’ remind me of?"

o For Relationship/Love: "When did I first feel unworthy of
love?" & "What does this feeling of ‘undeserving of love’
remind me of?"

o Other: "When did I first feel ‘this limiting
belief/emotion’? & "What does this feeling of
________________ remind me of?"

- Edit/change the questions to match your feelings/core
issues. Hint: Our core-issues can be found by answering,
"When I consider this ‘event’, what’s the worst thing this
could say about me?" The answer will always look like, "it
means I’m not capable/smart enough/good enough/ worthy of
love, etc." And, it’s the thought that we most hate, fight,
and rebel against. (The more you deny it, the more likely
it’s your core issue.)

- Now, schedule 3 to 60 minutes a day to just start working
your list.

- Select the bullet that is the earliest memory/event. In
the far left column, I like to add a box to the ones I want
to tap first; followed by a check-mark when I neutralize it.
In the far right column, rate your current SUDs (Subjective
Unit of Distress) level on a scale of 1-10 (10 being the
most painful).

- Apply EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique). Check in again,
and if you’ve shifted, cross out the previous SUDS level and
note your current SUDS. Continue tapping until you hit ZERO
– even if it takes multiple sessions.

- Be mindful not to move to the next domino. If your mind
is now on the next event, note it and return to THIS event.
"How do I feel about THIS event?" And, continue working
that ONE keystone event until you neutralize it (zero).
Then, move to the next memory, if it’s still there.

There’s more I’d like to share about the power of this
process… but I know I’ve gone on too long already. The
bottom line is we are what we think most. Eliminating those
past-inspired thoughts of unworthiness
will leave us whole, complete, and happy. From this place,
manifesting our dreams is effortless.

I look forward to hearing of your success! (Please post
your questions and comments – I’ll try to answer them in
future morsels.)

For an EFT tutorial, visit:

For EFT & LOA for relationships, prosperity, ideal fitness:
http://www.creatavision.com/products.htm

For information on Quantum Jumping,
http://www.creatavision.com/recommends/QuantumJumping

302Comments (6)http%3A%2F%2Fwww.creatavision.com%2Fwordpress%2Fis-a-linchpin-holding-your-limiting-beliefs-in-place%2FIs+a+Linchpin+Holding+Your+Limiting+Beliefs+in+Place+2010-08-26+17%3A08%3A32Anisahttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.creatavision.com%2Fwordpress%2F%3Fp%3D302

August 4, 2010

But I never seem to get what I expect

Category: law of attraction — Anisa @ 8:50 am

Q: “Hi Anisa, I have been noticing something very peculiar happening in my life. I seem to be manifesting circumstances, events, things, etc. that I *do not* expect, both positive and negative. If I expect something, then it never happens, but if I don’t expect it, as in not thinking about it or dismissing it as “oh, that will never happen” and kind of forgetting about it, most of the time it will happen. Right now, I am confused about the metaphysical books I have read because they have been teaching me the opposite of what is happening to me….it’s almost like I have my ‘own’ way of creating my reality, it seem to be backwards/reversed for me. I just began noticing this last year. Now, when I think back about the major events in my life (and events I wanted but never experienced) I see that this is exactly what has been happening to me all along. Have you ever hear of anything like this before? I swear….whenever I *expect* something, some object, some circumstance, whatever, chances are I usually do not get it, but the opposite happens when I *do not expect*. I’m puzzled and a little frightened of this because it has built up momentum, negative situations that I *never* thought possible is happening, and now I feel I must rearrange the way I look at my existence. I hope this makes sense to you, I know it sounds crazy. Thank you. – Patricia

A:
I can see why this would be terribly disturbing – to think perhaps that the way you create is completely opposite to how the Universe is set up for everyone else!

Do not despair! I believe that you too are operating under the same Universal Laws as everyone else. We simply need to reconsider the language we use when we interpret the Principles. I believe we have a slight misunderstanding about what the word “expectation” really means in the context of intentional creation.

Did you ever get in trouble as a kid because you thought a word meant one thing, but as it turned out it meant something different entirely?

As a teenager, I had a really bad argument with my mom once because I didn’t ‘open’ the shower curtain to let it dry. She had told me dozens of times, “please leave the shower curtain open.” Well I thought ‘opening’ it meant leaving it ‘wide open’ so the air could circulate inside the shower. But, she meant ‘opening’ it so that the shower curtain itself was stretched open. I would say, “I did too leave it open, I swear I did!” She would say, “You did not!” And, round and round we went until finally I marched into the shower and showed her what open meant to me. Finally, like an asteroid come to rest – we realized we were talking two different languages! We laughed hysterically at the absurdity of our clash after that.

There’s a difference between expectation with faith and allowance and expectation with attachment and desire. The latter is counter-creative, while the former supports rapid manifestation results.

Let’s do a bit of a perception check with the LOA material regarding ‘Expectation’.

“It is no use to desire a thing unless you expect to get it, either in part or in full. Desire without expectation is idle wishing or dreaming. You simply waste much valuable mental energy doing this.” – “Working with the Law” by Raymond Holliwell

- Raymond Holliwell’s instructions would indicate that intentional creation fails without expectation. Thus, we assume we must not only desire something but expect it to happen in order to activate the Law of Attraction. But, what kind of expectation is actually supportive?

“Most misery is born of failed expectations so let us learn to minimize expectations so that we will feel far less guilt and disappointment.” – Deepak Chopra

- Since we know that all negative emotions are counter-creative, we understand Deepak Chopra’s instructions as telling us the opposite of Mr. Holliwell; that we need to minimize expectations in order to minimize negative emotions. But, how can we have both the right kind of expectation AND minimal expectations?

“… faith is born of gratitude. The grateful mind continually expects good things, and expectation becomes faith. The reaction of gratitude upon one’s own mind produces faith; and every outgoing wave of grateful thanksgiving increases faith. He who has no feeling of gratitude cannot long retain a living faith; and without a living faith you cannot get rich by the creative method…” - The Science of Getting Rich: Chapter 7, Gratitude, by Wallace D. Wattles

- Wallace Wattles seems to be telling us that by being grateful AND expecting good things, we eventually turn our gratitude and expectation into a “living faith.” And, only through this faith can we ‘get rich’ by the ‘creative method’. Thus, expectation, once again is essential but it’s a faith-filled, grateful act of expecting – completely different than attached or entitled expectation. So, how do we cultivate this faithful, positively supportive expectation?

“No follower of this philosophy can reasonably expect to accumulate a fortune without experiencing “temporary defeat”. When defeat comes, accept it as a signal that your plans are not sound, rebuild those plans and set sail once more toward your coveted goal. If you give up before your goal has been reached, you are a quitter.” – Think and Grow Rich, by Napoleon Hill [updated and revised version with author, Arthur Pell (2005)]

- Napoleon Hill and revisionist Arthur Pell seem to be telling us that we should expect both wealth and setbacks. Thus, we are to temper our enthusiasm with a healthy dose of reality and be prepared to accept the signs, adjust our plans, and be resilient. Does this mean that we must return to ‘reality thinking’ instead of ‘possibility thinking’?

“High achievement always takes place in the framework of high expectation.” – Charles Kettering, (1876-1958) American inventor, 140 patents, including the electrical starting engine, leaded gasoline, and Freon.

- Mr. Kettering, innovator extraordinaire, is telling us the secret of success is high expectations. Thus, it’s not that we must be hyper-realistic to the point of lowering our expectations. But, how do we garner high expectations, while being fair and realistic, faithful and grateful and detached simultaneously?

“I am open to the guidance of synchronicity, and do not let expectations hinder my path.” – Dalai Lama

- My interpretation of the Dalai Lama’s words are that we should be open to the flow of intuition and guidance coming from synchronicities but not allow our expectations of what should be to interfere with our wellbeing, or our acceptance of what’s next on our path. Therefore, we are to continue to detach from the outcome and thereby release our expectations.

“Expectation indicates the juncture between where you are and where you want to be. Where you want to be, is your desire, and where you are, is your Set-point or habit of thought. And somewhere, in there, is what we would call expectation. Expectation, whether it is wanted or unwanted, is a powerful point of attraction.” – Abraham-Hicks

- Abraham, through Jerry and Ester Hicks, are telling us that expectation is the bridge between our current state of reality and what we want to experience. They are saying that expectation is a powerful, creative emotion to be employed and utilized in intentional creation.

“Your expectation is always what you believe. But the word expectation does imply more what you are wanting than what you are not wanting. It is a more positive word than it is a negative word, but of course, you could expect negatively and whatever you expect, you will get!” – Abraham-Hicks

- Here, Abraham, is saying your expectation is equal to what you believe. And, as conscious creation students we understand that no matter how much we ‘want’ something, it is our beliefs that will either attract or repel it.

“When hope is not pinned wriggling onto a shiny image or expectation, it sometimes floats forth and opens.” – Anne Lamott (best-selling author)

- This is probably my favorite quote of all. When we attach ourselves too firmly to an expectation, we are not allowing. The Law of Attraction is always operating under the auspices of the Law of Detachment, thus the phrase ‘It’ll happen when you least expect it” resonates so strongly. Refusing the “pin our hope down through expectation” enacts the law of allowing and detachment.

“In regards to expectation, we not only get what we put our attention upon but what we expect. However, most of us don’t really realize what we expect. We tend to dismiss our ‘expectations’ as mere observations when more often than not they are insidious ideas that prevent our dreams from manifesting with greater ease.” - Anisa Aven (Oh… that’s me – from a video I did on persistence and resilience.)
So let’s recap:

• Desire (alone): Manifestation fuel= Poor
  • Certainly manifestations occur through desire alone. However, there are always more creative emotions lurking underneath, such as ‘courage’, ‘persistence’, ‘hard-work’, “a willingness to compromise” and even ‘anger’ can help a person manifest for where there’s desire, there’s direction.

• Desire + hope: Manifestation fuel = Average
  • This state has potential but it is not the most optimal vibration. Hope is often too steeped in lack to be stable. On the other hand, when ‘hope’ is a noun, it’s entirely different. When we find hope after a long, dark tunnel – it’s incredibly uplifting and can help a person out of the darkness. But, when we use hope as a ‘verb’ and we are ‘hoping’ to have more money (someday) or hoping to get married (someday), then these are not optimal for efficient conscious creation.

• Desire + expectation: Manifestation fuel = It Depends if it’s expectation/faith vs. expectation/fear or excessive expectation vs. faithful expectation.
  • This combination is only effective if we have expectation without attachment. If your expectation is filled with belief, faith, certainty and a knowingness that ‘it’s all good, no matter what’, then you are aligned with your goals. But, negative (or less optimal results) will occur when the expectation is coupled with an attachment. Attachment comes in many forms but here are a few examples:

o Entitlement: a self-absorbed sense that you don’t have to do anything; that the Universe/people/the world owes you something.
o Co-dependence: an underlying fear that if you do not get what you want then you cannot be happy/whole/fulfilled/etc.
o Proof: an underlying fear that you have to prove your worthiness and only if you manifest something a certain way or a specific thing, will you allow yourself to feel successful, special and/or worthy.
o Fear of Failure: if you can’t succeed at ‘manifesting’ then it’s just more evidence that you are a failure.
o Fear of Success, fear of deservingness, fear of not being good enough, fear of loss, fear of change, fear of loss of love, etc. etc.

The bottom-line is when you release your attachment while still expecting GOOD things, you are enacting faith and certainty, two essential ingredients for conscious creation success. Thus, it’s not expectation that’s the issue, but the other ingredients that allow you to detach and trust in the Universal Principles as constant and all-providing.

RT @AnisaAven Strike right balance betwn high expectations & law of allowing is required for optimal conscious creation http://bit.ly/d0lp8X

It’s important to understand that it’s not expectation that lets us down, but our attachment to the outcome that causes our expectations to disappoint us, and even prevent us from manifesting success. http://bit.ly/d0lp8X

Reprint Anisa’s articles, information here.

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