We were born with the unlimited potential to intentionally create (use the law of attraction) to manifest all of our heart's desires. Together, as Conscious Leaders guided by the Divine, we have the Mind Power necessary to co-create a sustainable, harmonious, peaceful, and prosperous world.  And, we can do this while also attracting and creating a passionate, loving, rich, healthy life with all of our personal dreams fulfilled.

Surrogate Tapping without permission wrong and manipulative?

Category: emotional freedom technique,law of attraction,Surrogate EFT — Anisa @

Dear Anisa,

I’m an EFT practitioner and recently had a disturbing
surrogate tapping experience.  During a class, a volunteer
(let’s call her Mary) asked that we work on her son (let’s
say John). It seems that John has a serious addiction, has
had serious fights with his parents, moved out of their home
and stopped all contact. Mary wanted to work on this issue.
We mentally asked for permission to work on his addiction.
We did not get permission to work on that (we saw him
turning away, and several participants received a big NO).
After this we asked permission to work on his feelings of
not being loved and accepted the way he is by his parents.
We asked permission, and seemed to get it, so we started to
work surrogately on this. However, right in the middle of
the first round the skype conference room completely
blocked, chucked us all out, we could not get back in and
had to cancel the whole class. Later on I managed to log
back in and the whole recording was gone. When I talked
later to some of the other participants, they said they
sensed a very black, negative energy. So it seems, that
after all there was no permission to work on him. This is
still OK – the problem is, that Mary cannot let go of this
issue and (naturally enough) is very adamant about helping
her son get rid of this very damaging addiction. When I
talked to her, I found out that she was doing surrogate
tapping for her son saying things like: I am John and I feel
less and less craving for this substance, and feel more and
more inclined to go back to my parents..etc. Now to me this
feels like pure manipulation, and as if she cannot hand this
problem over to the Universe. How would you approach a
problem like this?  With love and appreciation for your
work, A.

Q: Is Surrogate Tapping without permission wrong and
manipulative?

The thing is – I’ve never asked permission before I pray or
think ‘good thoughts’ for a friend or a loved one.    I’ve
never thought, “I know the people in Gaza are in great pain.
I wonder who might grant me permission so that I might pray
for their healing, the restoration of human rights and for
lasting peace?”

Is Surrogate EFT different than a direct prayer?  Most of us
would never ‘pray for bad things to happen to another’, nor
would we do Surrogate Tapping for bad things either.

Never the less, it doesn’t matter.

It is my belief that we cannot create in another person’s
reality without their permission (whether we ask verbally or
spiritually for that permission or not.)   If we perform
Surrogate Tapping EFT for someone and it’s not a vibrational
match, then it simply cannot take hold – no matter how badly
we may want it!

Our soul’s code is deeply embedded and forever connected to
Free Will and our Soul Purpose.  We, as outsider’s thinking
we know what’s best , especially when we are in pain, cannot
supersede their free will without their consent
(vibrationally) no matter what we believe about the power of
our minds. But… what about Voodoo and Black Magic?

Since Surrogate EFT is so effective at influencing others’
experiences and how we relate and experience others, doesn’t
this make it a form of voodoo or black magic?

I don’t know what you call black magic but my understanding
is that it’s nothing more than a negative thought form
thrown into an open doorway.  If I leave my door open to
‘victimization’ and someone throws foul spells through it,
is it their fault or mine?  Perhaps it’s both.  Never the
less, we are in mutual agreement on the dance floor of this
‘magic’.

I look at black magic like I do a virus.  I can be around
sick folks all day long and not catch that cold unless I
believe (consciously or unconsciously) that viruses and
bacteria cause illness.  No matter what we learn in science
class about viruses causing illness – there will always be
those impervious people out there than NEVER catch that
cold.  The assumption is flawed and the science actually
confirms our belief that ‘what we believe, we receive’
instead.

I made Parker, my 12-year-old, do a book report this last
summer on Don Miguel Ruiz’s book The Four Agreements.  (Poor
kid… he whined and moaned because he has such a weird mother
that would make him read such a thing!?!)   His take-away
was the story of ‘Black Magic’ and why we must choose to be
“Impeccable with our words”.

The example in the book was about the mother who was having
a really bad day.  Her daughter was happy and singing her
heart out and the mother lashed out mindlessly, “Would you
shut up?!?!  You have a terrible voice!!”

The daughter took these words to heart and never sang again.
The black magic was sent through the open doorway of a
child’s vulnerable, approval seeking heart.   The effect on
this child, of course, was different than the effect on
another – why?!?  Not because black magic is inconsistent,
but because one child is vulnerable and therefore a
vibrational match and the other is not.

(Ask my father if I listened to him when he said, “You’ll be
lucky if you make it to 20 – as clumsy and stupid as you
are?!?!)

Now, having said all the above, it’s also important to feel
aligned and honoring of the person we are performing
surrogate tapping upon.

Please, by all means, ask permission, if that’s what your
heart says is right!   Additionally, I always coach my
clients and myself on releasing attachment to the outcome.
It is NOT up to us to decide what’s for the highest good of
another person’s experience.  This is true whether we want
to accept this Truth or not.  (Deep sigh… I know this to be
true even when it’s my children’s experience!!)

I choose to say the following to engage the highest
intention for all:

“I ask that this Surrogate Tapping  (or prayer) go forth and
do whatever it’s meant to do, for the highest good for all
parties involved.  I release my attachment to the outcome.
If this intention is meant to support my loved one, it will
and if not, then I honor their sacred journey as perfect for
them, no matter what. ”

Do what feel is right in your heart.

Regarding the mother who continues to tap for her beloved
son, know that this is all part of the Divine Plan for her
and for him.  It can be on other way for God simply doesn’t
make mistakes.

Be Sociable, Share!

• 

123Comments (2)http%3A%2F%2Fwww.creatavision.com%2Fwordpress%2Fsurrogate-tapping-without-permission-wrong-and-manipulative%2FSurrogate+Tapping+without+permission+wrong+and+manipulative%3F+2009-10-16+21%3A46%3A29Anisahttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.creatavision.com%2Fwordpress%2F%3Fp%3D123